Music: Oceans – Jacob Lee


And yet it lingered
Evading my eviction notice
Refusing to vacate my mind
I willed it away with what little I had left
Tried to immerse it in abundant sorrow
Suffocate it with breathless nights
Carve it with a fractured heart
Squeeze it unresponsive with strained embraces
Trample it with reticent footsteps dancing among eggshells
Freeze it with ice much too cold for a warm heart to give
Mummify it with loathing I held for myself
Because maybe it could be meant for you
When it would not go
I thought
Maybe if I could burn the thoughts that remained
The pictures you carved into my vision
The words you stitched on my tongue
The stench of your cologne trapped in my clothes
The taste of your skin on my mouth
You would finally leave me
So I held a flame to your memory
It touched first your umber eyes
I watched the blaze in their reflection
Until the mirror turned to ash
And spilled to the floor
I guided a spark to your mouth
Drenched your lips in gasoline
Watched them shrivel to black
Curl into endless silence
The snake behind them too cauterized to breathe anymore
The flare caught your fingertips
Each one turning to charcoal
Crumbling in fragments to the ground
The crimson caressed your skin
Stretched to every inch I could not touch
I watched in silence, knowing the crackling of the inferno was taking pieces of me with you
A sacrifice I was willing to make if it meant you would go
The wind carelessly carried you away, billows of black smoke writhing into halos above your head
Now I am not the one spiraling
I looked at my feet, hidden beneath what was left of you
Now I am not the one below
I do not expect you to be gone forever
But should you return
I am the one holding the match


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